Ok, I lied. My Madonna blog entry wasn't the last for a while, but this one will be, I promise.I'd like you, dear reader, to do something for Minge...
A while ago, I copied one of Brett's outrageous ideas and I'd like to repeat that fabulous experiment. This is how it goes:
While I'm away, please think of a question or two which you'd like me to answer. I promise to answer each one on my return. No topic, you can ask whatever you like. I will give a full and frank response to each. Well, I might not. If it's totally vile, I might give a, "No comment."
Please leave your questions in the comments section.
We're getting the train to London at lunchtime tomorrow. See you on Friday, hopefully! If you don't hear from me by Saturday, I expect the train will have crashed and we'll be dead.
8 comments:
You are SO crazy, Minge. There are things we just shouldn't play with... I get scared, you know.
As for the question(s) I'll take my time to think about it and will come back later this week.
Be happy!
Am I right in remembering that your Gaydar profile lists your genital size as "extra large"?
And do you think I'm shallow for remembering only that detail?
1) You've mentioned several times your desire for political reform in the UK. But would you really want to give up the monarchy entirely? Could you live without a (totally defanged and there-for-amusment) Queen? Would you really want something as banal as a president? (OK, that was more than one question but they're all related).
2) How did you and Ian meet?
Have you liked someone so much but didn't tell them because you thought it would ruin a friendship?
If so, who was it?
Imagine you're given the power to change mentalities. However, you've got only one chance to make it work. What absolute change would you focus on? To achieve what? (Yeah, yeah, two questions, I know, but they're inseparable!)
I'm looking forward to uncovering the mystery...
I want to know: 'What is the most inhumane thing you've ever done?" I make these up in my spare time, you know. And they wouldn't give me a bloody chat show. I don't know why.
P.S. You said 'full and frank'. You never said 'true'. In that spirit, I offer a response to my question that you may copy and post. 'I was once licking out some particularly delicious beluga that I'd smeared inside the queen mum, this being prior to her second hip operation, you understand. The first one made it hard, but at least we could wedge the second one up on her dresser, but the second hip op, a few weeks later, made it virtually impossible. Anyway, this starved mouse came in, obviously driven mad by the fishy smells, and possibly by the caviar, too. I crushed its windpipe using an old dai-un teshi maru technique, and then pushed its lifeless shell into the queen mum's aging snatch. It smelt better as a result, but I regret it to this day. Despite my thrill of remembrance.'
Dear god... that was all true. It was a repressed memory and I feel ill. Garageband succour... please... bass line bassline bass dunk dunk dunk
Coffee, I wouldn't think less of you if you drank from a bottle in my company because I already know you're quite fabulous. However, if we went to a nice restaurant and you drank direct from the bottle I would glare at you.
Being no size queen myself, I don't get excited by the "extra large" label - but I know others do, so use it! Lordy! I'm not bragging, just stating facts like eye colour, hair, height et al.
Although I think a vast amount of political change is needed in this country, I'm not sure I'd want the Queen/Monarchy to go altogether. Sure, she can stay, but she and her family simply MUST pay for their own upkeep and all political power removed. Our head of state simply must be elected, not forced upon us by accident of birth. I like the Irish model for President, similar to the German and Italian methods. I don't like a President in the fashion of the American of French version, with power of veto etc...
Ian and I met on ICQ. I'd just downloaded it and arstted playing with the buttons, not really sure what the damned thing was for or how it worked. I clicked on something and these drop down menus popped up. I picked Scotland, Outdoors, Gay, Sailing and one other that I can't remember. Woa! A list of people came up. The one on the top of the list was Ian. I double clicked on his name, still having no idea what I was doing... A chat window popped up. I said hi. He replied that he was busy. The rest, as they say, is history.
This answer is a bit short as I've never really liked someone so much that I didn't tell them. I'm very honest, emotionally, and tend to keep nothing to myself. Sorry there's no more to this! :(
The most inhumane thing I've ever done? I was once licking out some particularly delicious beluga that I'd smeared inside the queen mum, this being prior to her second hip operation, you understand. The first one made it hard, but at least we could wedge the second one up on her dresser, but the second hip op, a few weeks later, made it virtually impossible. Anyway, this starved mouse came in, obviously driven mad by the fishy smells, and possibly by the caviar, too. I crushed its windpipe using an old dai-un teshi maru technique, and then pushed its lifeless shell into the queen mum's aging snatch. It smelt better as a result, but I regret it to this day. Despite my thrill of remembrance.
I threw caterpillars onto a spider's web in my Mum's old greenhouse when I was about fourteen years old. It was a massive spider and I screamed every time I did it. I was scared shitless, but my sense of morbid curiosity was stronger than the fear. I feel terrible about it now. I must have seen off about fifty wee caterpillars over the course of the Summer.
Coffee, it does not bother me that you're born again. As much as I'd like people to respect me for who I am, I try to do the very same myself. As a Christian, you'll know we shouldn't judge people in any case. I slip up from time to time, largely over superficiality and trivia, but when things, like this, are more hardcore, I throw off my fey/drama/bitchy head and you get serious Minge. It doesn't happen very much though, but serious, I can sometimes be.
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