I've just got the Holy Moly! newsletter...
A mole was in a club in Tokyo recently and witnessed perhaps the most bizarre incident I have ever heard. It was a very exclusive invite-only club and our mole was with a friend when it looked like it was suddenly 'snowing' inside the club. It wasn't snow at all, but was actually thousands of small white feathers gently fluttering to the ground. His friend went to investigate and came back ashen-faced saying: "Go round the corner and tell me that what I've just witnessed is not a dream."
So the mole went, as instructed, around the corner and saw two go-go dancers gyrating in front of a booth. On closer inspection, he noticed that sat in the booth was a Very Famous Unmarried Hollywood Actor Prone To Starting Litigation If His Sexuality Is Ever Questioned. The actor was ignoring the go-go girls as he had 'bigger fish to fry'. Well, to be more precise, he had an almost-naked and very young man on his lap. Being spanked. While biting a pillow. And waving his head around so violently that the feathers were flying everywhere.
Who's being talked about, dear reader?