Tuesday, July 18, 2006

I confess

Confiteor Deo omnipotenti vobis fratres, quia peccavi nimis cogitatione, verbo, opere, et omissione, mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa.

I once stole chocolate from my brother's coat pocket.

I am a slothful glutton.

I was once consumed with avarice.

As a teenager, I would masterbate, at length, many times a day.

I have known vanity. And pride. I thought I needed no-one and that I couldn't fail. I was so wrong.

I've been known to tell people I like them, whereas, if the truth be known, I've hated their guts and sometimes wished them dead.

I am envious of people with hair. Lots of hair.

I've been known to have lustful thoughts.

I am greedy.

I say Christ a lot. In a bad way.

I've been shopping on a Sunday.

By my consumption of animal products, I am guilty of murder.

I have disobeyed both my Parents.

I have been shoplifting.

I've spread gossip.

I was jealous of a very popular boy in school and coveted his very smart, very fashionable, trousers and blazer.


Brian said...

And yet you cannot confess your love for me.

How sad.

Minge said...

I love you, of course I do.

Dan said...

Dont worry, I've got an office waiting for me in Hell - you can be my receptionist ;)

Minge said...

Brian, has anyone ever confessed to NOT loving you? No? Thought not.

Dan, I like lots of coffee breaks. Is this ok?

alan said...

It's hell. You'll be allowed lots of guilty pleasures. Coffee breaks a go-go!

Minge said...

And will smoking be back on the agenda?

Blogging for scraps... said...

Cheers for that minge. I now feel like we're almost related.

Minge said...

Perhaps we are!?

RIC said...

What a pleasant ambiance! Pity though I'm not a catholic anymore.
It seems I'll be going somewhere else, but not to hell. I wish I could meet you all still in good time...

Minge said...

I don't think hell exists, if it helps. If it does, we make it here, for ourselves.

RIC said...

Right, fine with me. You've got a deal!
Wish you all the best!

Minge said...

Everything's fabulous.

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