Seagull

Happy Slapping is so 2005. To be too cool for school these days you have to do the Seagull.

In schools all over London, apparently, break-times are seeing boys running into the bogs to masturbate furiously, collect their jizz in the palms of their hands, then go out and find a younger kid.... then slap them in the face while shouting "SEAGULL!"

Try it in the office when you're bored.

Oh, the youth of today. In the old days, when I was young, we would play the biscuit game. We'd put a rich tea or digestive down on the floor and stand around it, wanking, the aim to cum all over the biscuit. The last one to cum had to eat the biscuit.

It was never me.